So their son will be your nephew. After you’re wed to Cersei, of course. And you will be the king’s stepfather and brother-in-law. When you marry the king,Joffrey’s mother will become his sister-in-law.and your son will be Loras’ nephew?Grandson?I’m not sure.
(Source: madisonyork)
(Source: hairyrussian)
i dont date in high school because no one is rich yet so whats the point
my friend just called his daughter “what’s her face”
life hack: be nice to people with a pool at their house
| You: | hi |
| Stranger: | hey |
| You: | wanna cyber |
| Stranger: | Depends are you a girl? ;) |
| You: | ya |
| Stranger: | And okay then, you start? |
| You: | i come into ur bedroom |
| You: | and ur sleeping |
| You: | and i crawl under your blanket |
| Stranger: | I'm still asleep |
| You: | u feel me pulling down ur pants |
| You: | and u wake up and smile |
| Stranger: | I kiss you gently, still sleepy |
| You: | then i smile and open the scissors around your dick and snap them closed |
| You: | cutting off your penis |
| Stranger: | wait |
| You: | THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR CHEATING ON ME |
| Stranger: | Then what...? |
| You: | I HATE YOU |
| Stranger: | I didn't cheat |
| You: | you bleed to death in your bed |
| Stranger: | i didn't cheat on you. lets restart ok |
| You: | nobody ever knows what happened |
| You: | i flee to mexico with your Mercedes |
| You: | the end |
| Stranger: | I have a mercedes? |
| You: | not anymore faggot |
| Your conversation partner has disconnected. |
visiting Yahoo Answers instead of a doctor
the girl sitting next to me in class is wearing the same shirt as me in a different colour and we keep awkwardly looking at each other like do I say something or just sit here help
i said ‘nice shirt’ and she said ‘better than yours’ i’m done
(Source: brandfckingnew)
if you owned a company it would go bankrupt very quickly because you do not know how to mind your own business
